When I had to leave my former career as an international missionary leader (interspersed with jaunts as a pastor’s wife), I thought that God had forgotten…about what He had inspired me to do, what I had loved, what I’d given my life to for fifteen years. I lost so much: my role as an encourager of others, a thirteen-year marriage, a family with a dad, and my spiritual purpose.
Single parenting days living with my parents
I’ve spent the last eighteen years trying to figure out and redefine who the new JoDee is, and I admit I’ve entertained doubts that I’d ever find my way through this (my former story).
Thanks to my hubby, Justin, for doctoring up this photo
But in 2010, I realized that God didn’t forget. He just resurrected my aspirations in the hearts and lives of my children.
Elya and me visiting Josiah when he worked in Buenos Aires, Argentina for a start-up company.
This became very apparent while reading the rough draft MBA application essays my son, Josiah, wrote. I blubbered through his words, “After graduating from UCLA, I realized that my mother’s dedication motivated me to succeed and inspired me professionally. What truly drives me is a desire to use my business acumen to empower international entrepreneurs seeking positive global impact.”
In 2010, I realized that my son shares my passion to help the unfortunate and is willing to commit his career to this aspiration. He even started a blog as part of this quest,
http://entrepreneurshipacrosstheworld.wordpress.com/
My daughter also has itchy feet and a heart for the underprivileged. Elya graduated from UCLA with a Global Studies major. She just returned from a fifteen-month trip volunteering in a Cambodian school and teaching English in Seoul, South Korea.
Elya with some of her students in Korea
Last night she Skyped me from another city to ask for my advice about which of her novels she should finish first for the Writer’s Digest New York conference. We both read our Writer’s Digest Magazines while discussing possibilities.
Skyping with Elya while we read our Writer's Digest Magazines
I realized that although she is a unique person with her own dreams, she inherited my passions for travel, altruism, teaching, and writing.
No, God hasn’t forgot…He just reworked my original dreams in ways I never thought possible. And for that, I am truly thankful.
He doesn’t forget but I do often. I love when I have time to reflect on days gone by and realize how he has been working in my life. Never in quite the way I imagined but working none the less with more spectacular results than I could have fathomed.
flyingma, I agree. I also marvel at the outcomes. I think this is one of the many reasons why we are better off trusting Him.
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Encourage your children to follow their paths. I had those same desires 30 years ago and let others talk me out of it. My biggest regret in life.
Its amazing how God reworks our lives…I have several stories but that would take more than 15 minutes.
You know, Shelly, I thought about your “15-Minute Challenge” while I wrote this post. I confess to failing miserably. It took me far too long. On the upside, it was really therapeutic to write. Can we cheat if it helps us process? 🙂 If so, I would love to read some of your stories.
I got goosebumps when I read your post – the way you have impacted your children’s lives is beautiful. It’s funny how we (I) can get so frustrated because life isn’t going down the path we (I) thought it should go, but a look back reveals what He knew all along – we (I) never went off track.
Janna, thank you for the encouraging comment. I always doubt after posting such personal history details so your comment came at just the right time. I have to tell you, reading my son’s essays totally bowled me over. I never dreamed he felt that way about me. I like your words “…a look back reveals what He knew all along – we(I) never went off track.” Beautifully written.
God is good and you are blessed, which of course, is just like our God. After super nova, out came the new you, shining more brightly, revealing the grace of God more brilliantly than ever, with the likelihood that such holy exposition would produce new stars. I know it had to be a rough ride. Looking back you see its amazing trail. Our great God gives us beauty for ashes. Blessings to you, JoDee…
Carol Ann,
What a beautiful and poetically written comment. The imagery of stars holds special significance in my spiritual life. Yes, it was a rough ride but the stars peeking out from behind the dark clouds are twinkling ever so brightly.