Clarity

Have you ever longed for clarity?

Or noticed that when vision blurs, daily life frustrates? It’s not as if you can tell yourself, “I have to do this now, but I’ll get back to ___________ later” because you don’t know what _______________ is.

Every interruption increases internal turmoil. You feel as if life’s daily demands keep you from discovering ____________. Whatever ____________ is. Uncertainty steals your serenity.

I don’t like those days when I feel perplexed. I resent those times when woe permeates the air. I want to stand on top of the mountain and see the next summit, but clouds of confusion blur the view.

After all the difficulties I’ve come through in my life, I believe I still have some purposes left to fulfill. Yet, to figure out what those things are, I need clarity and clarity only comes after a certain amount of emotional and mental wrestling.

My husband knows when I have an epiphany. He says he can see me struggle to figure something out; and when I do, a peaceful look moves across my face.

Sometimes he’s the one who brings the clarity. He patiently listens to my rambling until I take a breath, and then inserts some insight that slices through my confusion. The clouds part and insight graces. I thank God for Justin and often wonder where I would be without his steady wisdom.

I also have a circle of women that help me to get my head right (as my sister Gina so aptly describes what we do for each another). Processing my angst with someone I trust helps to clear the way for clarity.

I don’t just need clarity for the big picture; I also need to know which smaller pieces fit into my life’s puzzle on any given day.

I’ve discovered a few creative habits that help. Writing helps me to process my thoughts and emotions. Scribbling down every foul, frustrating, and fretful thought works like releasing the valve on a pressure cooker.

Does it always solve the questions I have over what I should do with my life? No! But, releasing the pent-up emotions helps me to move through my day a little more peacefully. Once the emotional clutter is out-of-the-way, insight flows more readily.

Sometimes the breakthrough comes while putting on my make-up or getting dressed or driving to work. I’ve also learned to stop and capture fleeting thoughts before they dissipate, which sometimes means pulling over on the side of the road to write ideas down.

Painting also helps me to get clarity. Often the ideas for paintings come as a result of inner wrestling.  For example, I painted Bon Voyage when the urge to finish my devotional book for creatives started tugging at my soul. Dread over the thought of doing the work of self-publishing again had bound me up inside.

Another tip I use for finding clarity is a creative excursion. Getting away from it all to spend time in a beautiful place does wonders for indecision.

I don’t think I’m alone in my desire for clarity, and it sure helps to know I’m not. I’m certain others go through times of confusion and frustration as well.

We artistic types tend to weather more mental and emotional storms than most. So we need to remind ourselves that we don’t have to do life perfectly. We’re in a process. One day we’ll look back and see how far we’ve come by the marvelous pieces of art, or writing, or pottery we’ve created while on our quest for clarity!